Unstressing

As my previous post stated, today is sort of an important day. I still dont want to go into details just yet, its nothing horrible, and has nothing to do with my health or anything, however, it is stressing me out beyond belief. My stomach has been in knots since Sunday and I am a nervous wreck. My whole body is stressed out by this situation and I am hoping that this certain someone decides to take the high road and do the right thing. If they choose not to, I am going to have a huge pile of shit to take care of for some time. I have been trying to use simple breathing techniques to help calm down my nerves and have been trying to concentrate my thoughts on work or other pleasant things, however, my mind keeps taking me back to this stressful situation.

And of course, music always helps.

Tuesday, March 31st

It all comes down to this big day. If someone doesnt do something as promised, let the games begin. More details to come....

Lets all hope they choose to make the right decision though. ;) Life will be much easier for all parties involved.

New Hottie in Town

Wow, I cant believe I completely forgot the highlight of my week! On Monday at 1:15pm my brothers wife gave birth to their second child! I went to see the little stinker the next day to see what was birthed and I honestly was shocked on how cute the baby actually was. The sad part of this story is that my brother wasnt even able to be at the birth because he is in Iraq serving our country in the Army. They wouldnt let him come back to for one of the most important days of his life. Nonetheless, introducing the next heartbreaker in town, weighing in at exactly 8lbs......Tyler Leo!:

Randomocity

Man oh man; I’ve had the worst two weeks of work eva! As I mentioned I was completely bogged down here at work. It was non-stop working for the most part, but all of my hard work paid off. I have received complements from all of my managers telling me how amazing I did since I did basically all the work. And to be honest, even though the workload sucked, I am glad I did when I did, because we discuss our raises next week, so I am sure my performance will help that.

Other than that, not much else is going on. I am completing the last few days of my stacker supplements *known as NxCare Mass Cycle*, and I honestly couldn’t be happier with the results. My body has never been in such great shape and I have never lifted so weighed so much in my life. I am currently at 155lbs so I only have to gain 10 more lbs of muscle before July and I would have reached my goal. After speaking to some people, they think if I keep up my routine I should actually probably expect to get even bigger than that. 

I have a so called “twin” at my gym who looks a lot like myself, although he is much better looking and his body is a beautiful mass of muscle. Not too much but not too little. His body is my dream body. And his name is also Jeff. We were meant to be soul mates even though he is straight.

I got permission from the bf to post a body pic to show the progress I have made even though I don’t really have any before shots. Not that I would have wanted anyone to see those anyways. I tried taking them myself but the effect is loss when I am trying to hold up a camera a certain way and what not, so I am going to have to recruit the bf when we can find the time to take my glamour shot photos.

The bf and I are cooking dinner for our friend who helped us move into our new apt tonight. I wanted it to be a nice fancy dinner for him and a date of his choosing. He seems pretty excited about the idea. We have a lot of cooking to do once I get home from the gym tonight, so it is bound to be pretty hectic. Here is what is on the menu:

Appetizers:
Homemade Bruschetta w/ fresh Parmesan Cheese on Ciabatta Bread
Tossed Salad

Main Course:
Cheese Tortelloni w/ homemade Alfredo Sauce
Sausage Ravioli w/ Red Sauce
French Style Cut Greens
Baked Dinner Rolls

Dessert:
Chocolate Fondue w/ Strawberries, marshmallows, pineapple, apples, pretzels, and graham crackers

Sounds pretty bomb right? Nothing screams Eat Me! like a table full of carbs.

Hope y’all have a great weekend!

I am Grateful

In order to not look so self indulgent as well as look like I am one huge complainer after my last post, I decided to follow up that list with this one. One that is a bit more cheery that will show just how grateful I am for certain things in my life.

I am grateful for being alive

I am grateful for having a roof over my head

I am grateful to have a job

I am grateful to be self sufficient

I am grateful for the amazing friends that are in my life

I am grateful for having the best family in the world all whom support everything I do

I am grateful for having the most amazing man love me for who I am. Even the extremely weird sides which I know he secretly loves even more.

I am grateful for being able to almost afford the finer things in life

I am grateful for having the capability to make others smile and laugh

I am grateful when people confide in me

I am grateful for the conversations I have with my Mom

I am grateful for having a couch to lay on and cable tv to watch

I am grateful for my semi amazing cooking skills

I am grateful that I am real with my friends and dont need to put on a front

I am grateful that I am not afraid to speak my mind

I am grateful for being overall healthy

I am grateful for keeping up on this blog here thingy

I am grateful when I see someone doing a random act of kindness

I am grateful that no one close to me has ever passed away

I am grateful with overall being happy with who I have become as a person and hope that I continue to grow into the adult that I want to be

I'm Am Tired

This is a post about me bitching. Gotta get some stuff off my chest. Thanks.

As of late, overall things have been going great. I got my apartment in the condition that I wanted it to be in and I finally got Comcast to wise up and give me what I wanted. But as of late, I have been tired of being Mr. Nice guy. You know, the guy who will basically bend over backwards to make someone else happy even to the detriment of his own. Here is my list of I'm so tired of this bullshit:

I am tired of showing people acts of kindness and not really ever seeing it returned.

I am tired of people who do not follow through with something when they promised me they would.

I am tired of people not making things that affect other people their priority.

I am tired of people bitching they have no friends but yet do nothing to change it and/or bad mouth the ones they do have because they do not meet their expectations. It is not other people's fault you have no friends. Its your own! Think back to why you have lost your old friends and recall why that happened. If that is a reoccurring theme, its not them, its YOU! You need to look inside and try to figure out why no one likes you and change! Otherwise, you will never have anyone!

I am tired of being let down by someone when I know in fact that they were going to in the first place.

I am tired of people saying "I have a problem with alcohol and I want to learn to control it" but then go out the next day and get wasted

I am tired of putting on a fake smile when I really dont want to

I am tired of people not responding to my emails and phone calls on important matters

I am tired of seeing guys with popped collars *Please god stop the madness!!!

I am tired of acting like I care when I really dont

I am tired of hearing people do nothing but bash on our new President

I am tired of looking at pictures and stories about the Pope

I am tired of people not doing their job

I am tired of people not answering a simple question

I am tired from not sleeping well

I am tired of my ham and mayo sandwiches for lunch

I am tired of the norm

I am tired of not doing what I want

I am tired of not being able to afford the tattoo I want

I am tired of not saying "Fuck em all"

I am tired of being very tired from all of this.

Finally!!!

I have been waiting for a certain DJ to do a gig around Pittsburgh for quite some time now. Even though Pittsburgh itself doesnt have huge DJs come anymore, Cleveland Ohio is only 1.5 hours away and gets all the big guys. So Deadmau5 *pronounced Deadmouse* will be in Cleveland on April 3rd and I am freakin excited. This guy is probably the biggest up and coming DJ in a long time. He is relatively new, and is already a household name with techno/electronic music lovers.
Check out some of his beatz:

Oh Saint Patrick!

These are the only 2 photos i think I have of myself from the St. Paddy's day festivities from this weekend. You cant see it, but the shirt I am wearing I created myself. It is sporting a card boards cereal box cut out of two Leprechauns from a Lucky Charms box held on by packing tape. Thats just how I roll. And whats with the amazingly cool head band thing I am wearing? Well I found that little guy on our table broken, unloved, and left all alone, so I snatched that fucker up, and wore it like I had been wearing it since the day I was born. The girl that is in both pictures happens to be one of my 4 awesome step sisters. Love her!

American Idol Adam Lambert

I am not sure which of you American readers actually watch this show anymore, but I am hooked on it, just as I have been through previous seasons. This year if you havent heard, we have an openly gay contestant who in my eyes is the best of them all. Last night was "Country" night which pretty much sucked overall, however, Adam's performance I thought was absolutely amazing. Vocals were spot on and the rendition of the song rocked. Sadly however, the judges just seemed weirded out by the performance. Check it out below. Do you agree?

Crazy Days

I apologize for being absent as of late, but my job has been kicking my ass. I no longer have time to surf the net except on my lunch break which still gets interrupted with phone calls to Comcast the cable company. Yes, the battle with Comcast continues to wage forth crazy at that may seem. Last night I wrote a 5 page letter to the GM of Customer Service in their headquarters in beautiful San Fransisco. And I spoke to an executive there today who is actually willing to help me find a solution unlike everyone else who just attempted to put me into contact with people who dont know what they are doing.

This weekend we had our house warming party and I have to say, it couldnt have went any better. Most of the people came that I really wanted there, and everyone loved the new loft and congratulated us on how great it looked *due to my faboosh decorating skills*. People described it as a NYC Manhattan looking lounge type deal. The dark red, black, and white colors we used, mixed with the candles that were everywhere, along with the fun house music we has playing. At one point, it got a little too crowded with 23 people standing in my living room and kitchen, not leaving much room to do anything but start a bukkake. If you dont know what that is, you need to look it up, and look at pictures. Very safe work btw ;)

So yeah, St Paddys day celebrating went well. I got trashed and ended up looking retarded *no offense*, I will post pictures of that once I have some free time. This weekend should be interesting as I will be meeting the bfs parents for the first time ever! Even though I have to play coy and just be his roommate, I might sneak in little sexy glances or smacks on the butt. And of course by that I mean to his father! Grrrr. not really, but I am excited to meet them even if I have to lie about not eating and fucking their beloved sons ass.

Lastly, I gained 3 more lbs of muscle which is quite exciting!!! I still have a long way to go to meet my goal which is 12 more lbs of muscle, but its a good start and I have until July to do it, so I am feeling very positive about that.

Alright kids, hope you are having a good week! Ciao!

Talk About A Shoe Fetish

This video is kinda funny, kinda gross, and kinda cute all rolled into one.

Well Hello Mr Rugby Player

What a nice way to end a work day. By looking at this hunk du jour! he coudl use a little chest hair, but other than that, he will definitely do!

Blissful

I havent had much to write about as of late. I was just trying to think about what I should in fact write about because I am due for a post or two, and i just thought of why I have the case of the infamous writers block.

Thinking back over the past week or so, things in my life have just been for the most part, blissful. Things are good. Minus still not having a couch, full cable television, or fast internet. Its nice going home now everyday to the one guy who can put a smile on my face simply from saying hello.

We have been getting our routine together for our daily lives and household chores. Like when I cook dinner, he cleans up. And since I am the one who mostly cooks, I much obliged to this idea. I hate the cleanup but love making the mess. And for the first time ever, I have eaten a whole piece on fish. I am not the biggest fan of seafood and can only eat it if breaded. Well, so far last week we had 2 different dinners consisting of 2 types of fish. And I have to say, its not bad if you smother it in ketchup! :)

I have also spent the past week and a half searching for various decor to place around the new loft. And because I am on a budget, makes it hard to make what i want. I plan on doing this to create a work of art on my own, but I need the temperature to agree with me so I can do it outside. I also have been having some trouble deciding which two of my own photographs I want to get blown up and put into some nice frames for the living room. Maybe I can create a poll and post some of my pictures later on and you can all help me decide.

We have decided on an Asian theme for our living room/dining room areas. I love the contrast of reds/blacks/dark browns so it fits well with my personality and style. I know some of you *Sam* expressed interest in seeing pictures of the new pad, so once we get our new couch in on Thursday I will take some pictures of the new place and since it isnt that big, I only need to take a few.

Other than that, not much else going on. The bf and I are planning a St. Patty's Day/house warming party at the loft on Saturday night surrounded by 20 or so of our closest friends. If they can all fit anyways. I am not sure how much we are going to get into the St. Patty's Day spirit though. Pittsburgh loves to go all out, but I do not know if I am going to be up to it on Saturday morning to wake up and get bombed. I dont even have one of the cliche "Kiss Me I'm Irish" *which I am* T-shirts. But I am sure that one of my friends will drag me out by my teeth for kegs and eggs somewhere.

Lastly, the weather still sucks for the most part. We experienced 2 nice days of weather in the past week, but its all doom and gloom rain for the next few days here. I need sunshine and 75 degrees. Then I will be in pure bliss.

Down/Up

Yesterday I was finally able to get the cable guy to come to my new place to provide me with the endless happiness that tv and internet gives me. Well happiness only came half way last night. You see, with me, everything has to be hard. And not only in my pants. Nothing could ever go smoothly. So of course, I knew issues would arise when the cable guy was there. And of course it did. Lets track back here. My apartment building gets discounts through Comcast. Our partment building also has its own particular sales rep *Tom* who works there who knows what these discounts are. So I called him and set us up with the fastest internet they have as well as a nice little package for tv including HD and a DVR. This was all I ordered form him. However, a few days later, we needed to add a telephone line so that we can buzz people into our apartment building. So I called Tom to add the phone and he didnt answer. So I called Comcasts general customer service # and talked to nice lady on the phone. I explained to her that we get a discount yadda yadda and all I want to do is add a phone to everything I already have. She said great, clicked a few buttons and told me everything was good to go. Well she lied.

Apparently, she erased everything I had ordered, and gave me basic everything. Basic internet, basic cable, and no HD or DVR. But I did have phone! :) Bitch. Tom also assured me I would pay absolutely nothing the day of installation and I would be billed for everything. Well that didnt happen either. Before the cable install guy left, he asked me for a check or money order to pay for the install! I told him i was told I am not supposed to pay anything up front and I was going to be billed for everything. Which he understood how everything was messed up by the one lady at Comcast so he didnt make me pay. Especially because I would be paying for stuff I didnt even order. So now I am left with all this basic stuff until Tom personally comes to my loft on Sunday to replace everything.

:(

On a much happier note, I get my big tv replaced today. I went through the hassle of working with the tv company to fix and ship me a new one and bullshit, but I was told it was going to take roughly 2 weeks before I would see one. Luckily, the store I bought it from just received 10 in yesterday so during my lunch break I am going to switch them out. However, they are now charging $50 more for the same tv than what I bought it for, and customer service told me I will probably have to pay the extra $50 which I think is complete bullshit. But I guess once I bitch to a manager long enough, he will let that slide.

Its the weekend though, and I will have a new tv. That makes me happy.

Hello Leather Kitty

New Ad from Mac Cosmetics. Fun music. Muscle men in leather. Need I say more.

All Moved In

Well the bf and I finally moved into our new loft, and honestly, the move in process wasnt fun to say the least. We ran into a few major hiccups, but all is now good in the land of Pittsburgh. We started moving in on Friday, just packing up what boxes we could in our cars and transporting them to the new pad. This process would have been much more tedious if it wasnt for our amazing friends who took the time, muscle, and their cars to help us move over the course of 2 days.

On Saturday morning we arrived at the U-Haul station to pick up our moving truck at 7am. We were not there for no longer than 15 minutes, when a friend called who was waiting at the new loft while our new furniture arrived and said that the couch wont fit around a turn in our doorway. So I drove over the loft, and sadly enough, they were getting ready to pack up the couch and take it back because there was no way they were going to get in it. I was crushed and pissed because the bf and I spent way too long searching for the perfect sectional couch and we found it, or so we thought. But there was nothing we could do. They took the couch back so we now had to later go find another couch.

Back to more packing again. When I get a call from Comcast. Our cable and internet provider. They said they were waiting outside the apt to install everything at 8am. They were not supposed to be there for at least 4 hours! We didnt even have a TV in the apt yet! So I told them that they got their times wrong and long story short they agreed to come 2 hours later. However, that didnt go as planned either. Apparently, a very important wire had dropped inside a wall and the cable guy wasnt able to get it. He said that building maintenance would have to come and punch a hole into the wall so that they could locate the wire before he can give us cable/internet. So he left.

My apartment now holds a broken new tv, no cable/internet, and no couch to watch the broken tv without cable on. So you can all imagine how bored I was yesterday when I took off work because I have a horribly gross cold. So I layed on my living room floor in front of the windows and tanned in my underwear because the sun shines directly through our windows.

So after all that, regularity is on its way. We get our cable/internet installed on Thursday, and our couch delivered on Saturday. As for my tv being fixed, I am still not sure when that is going to be fixed. I am hoping sometime this week.

***I want to send a huge hug and thank you to all of our friends who helped us during this move. An extra double hug goes out to my friend Scott, who if it wasnt for his muscle burly bearness, we never wouldve gotten half my shit moved.