Friday, July 20, 2007


As part of my newly found hated job, I am required to travel and travel ALOT. I am generally only in my downtown office for 1 to 2 weeks a month at most. Up to the point that I got this job, I had only been on a plane once. I have always dreamed about having a job where I would get to travel and see new places. I have quickly learned that traveling isnt all its cracked up to be.

I hate being alone. I found this out shortly after breaking up with my bf of 2.5 years. Within two weeks of that break up, I was already seeing someone else. I love being with someone whether that is dating someone or just being in someones company. When I am alone, I cant relax cause I feel like I should be doing something. Which generally, if I am by myself, I don't want to do anything. Traveling for work, which most often is by myself, has forced me to enjoy being alone. I have to eat my meals without accompaniment. I have to watch TV and go to the gym with no one but myself. Although I know that this is good for me, it has definitely solidified the fact that I abhor being alone. I am not sure if that is necessarily a bad thing, but I know it isnt a good thing either.

I think alot of it has to do with the feeling of being wanted or cared for. I feel comforted knowing that someone cares for me and wants to be with me, and vice-versa. I enjoy caring after someone and doing things for them. It makes me feel like I have a purpose. And it gives me something to look forward to.

1 comment:

jay said...

You're not alone there. I haven't been involved in anything serious for almost 2 years and it sucks.