Monday, July 23, 2007

Weekend of the Unexpected....Part 1

My weekend was pretty much everything I thought it wouldn't be. Although it had many highs, it had one too many lows to call it an amazing weekend. Lets start off by talking about Friday night. Friday was one of the uneventful nights that started off with me getting drunk very early in the night during drinks at "the boys" house. From there we headed to Images, a bar I have never been before, and probably wont ever return. Nothing too exciting happened there either. There was a male porn star there that was getting a little to friendly for my comfort with one of the bars patrons. Call me old fashion but I dont find it necessary to see a man give/receive head and get a rim job in a bar. Call me a conservative. So "The Plastics" and myself walked over to Pegasus to which received a little makeover in which they moved the 21+ bar over to where the "Juice Bar" was. Once again nothing too exciting happened, "the boy" and I danced all night there, and I was still drunk and getting more sloppy drunk as the night went on. So it is quite natural for me to become very horny, and therefore I become increasingly flirtatious in all my actions whether it be ordering a drink, asking someone to move, or grinding on the dance floor.
That night ended in me spending the night at "the boy's" house cuddling as planned. :)

The next day we all went to Sandcastle as also planned. It was a bit too chilly for my taste but it was still fun. And I am finding that all this story isnt very fun or exciting so I am goin to jump right into the juicy stuff. Ok, so lets talk about how some assholes fist met my face on Saturday. Yeah, I wish it was the other way around but it wasnt. So I am at the afterhours club, which I really look forward to surprisingly. So there I am having a good time shakin what my mama gave me *which "The Plastics" have dubbed the Brian Kinney Dance, from QAF. So digressing, someone from behind me gave me a pretty good push in the attempt to make my Brian Kinney booty shakin booty out of their way. So being the asshole that I am I always just lean back and slightly give a push letting them know what they did wasnt acceptable. Normally it ends there. But not with this horrible, cheap aviator wearing wannabe gangsta diva. He shoved me right back to which I am none to pleased with. So we ensue in a little yelling match before he.....takes a swing. Yeah. During one of my Brian Kinney Dancing extravaganzas, this hoodlum just took a swing at my face. So he slightly grazes the very edge of my face, we will just call it a miss. So naturally being the ferocious Tiger that I am, I lunge towards this creature that has now taken off those horrible renditions of a pair of aviators *which I dont advocate people wearing in clubs...that look is sooo over. Anyways, before I can start to mangle this persons face with my hands I am pulled back by my friends at which point he swings again. And makes contact with my left eye. I am frantically trying to escape the arms of my friends so I can destroy this person*which I can because I have had formal training back in the day. And I am unable to break their grasps, which has left me screaming obscenities looking like a crazed mad man. So then I see this creature slowly back away smile at me and put back on those, ugh it kills me to say it, black aviators, and walk away. I then get told that I need to cool it or I am going to get kicked out by a security guard. Needless to say, I was pissed, and still am to a certain extent. No one has ever hit me before and has not at least gotten hit back. I have been in many fist fights before, all but 2 I have won. Those of course happened before I received my formal training in kicking someones ass. "The boy" really helped me calm down though. Apparently none of my friends saw him throw the punches as me, they just saw alot of movement of body parts. "The boy" said that if he would have seen him punch me he would have stepped in and started throwing punches himself, which I believe and appreciate.

So moral of the story:
1. Please lord DON'T wear sunglasses, especially cheap aviators, to bars
2. Have a written agreement forbidding friends to hold you back from pounding in someones face
3. Always be prepared for someone to swing
4. The Brian Kinney dance definitely works for me
5. Having "the boy" tell me that I was so sexy when I looked like a Tiger ready to attack someone was definitely worth getting hit
6. And this one has nothing to do with the story, but boy boys boys, please put down your popped collars. This isnt 2003 anymore. Ok. Thanks. Just a little FYI

There is actually more to tell about my weekend, but I am getting very tired, so I will save that post for tomorrow.

1 comment:

jay said...

Gee I've been here two years and nothing of the sort has even happened to me lol. Alls well that ends well right?